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Archive for October, 2007

You know this blog here that you read? Yes, this one. You know it’s written by me. You know me, that twenty-summat gal who gets all worked up about pretty much everything?
Well, maybe it isn’t…
(Clicky image for bigger)

Oooooh, can anybody be sure of anything anymore?

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scrummy mummy

I wasn’t happy with this photo when I first took it so I just dropped it in a folder of images to go “dusty” on my hard drive. Then I revisited it the other night. The more I look at it, the more I like it.
This is my gal Polly. She’s doing that licky thing [...]

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I swear that I will explode out of sheer desperation regarding this topic one of these days.
I had hoped that with time, rage would turn into simple resignation.
I mean, that is what happened where my loathing of SWT was concerned over the course of the 11 months that I commuted from Little City to London [...]

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Protected: confession - that you already knew

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Last night, after going to the GP’s, I wandered down to the Pub by Little Place Station for the Monday night pub quiz. This has become part of the weekly house routine, and is about the only real time I spend with the two other people I live with, Desk Editor and Transport Planner. When [...]

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oh, not this again…

The Boss is back to his snorting ways.
I am so tired, I just don’t think I can take it today.
The sleep deprivation is really catching up with me. I can’t concentrate. Mistakes that I have made previously are catching up with me. I still haven’t written anything for the magazine.
I am so dead.

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ramblings of an insomniac

It’s gone 2am and I AM STILL AWAKE. Still sitting up worrying. I have been staring into the darkness for hours. I hope that this will knacker me out enough to finally drop off.
It’s just me and The Hedgehog and some “away” people on MSN. Where are you American and Canadian bloggy folk, and you [...]

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Oops. Another moment of madness. Egged on by Maple Moose and Nursey, I just registered my unfit arse for this:

It’s not until next May and, assuming this op goes well, I will be ready to start running again at the start of 2008, which Nursey says is plenty of time to get me in good [...]

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Protected: i am actually bloody chuffed

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angry health rant

I feel so angry with the health service for not adequately informing me when I was young enough to potentially protect myself. Did you know the Pill increases your chances of cervical cancer? Yes, women, you did. They tell you that. But they don’t tell you why, do they? They just say, “Well, it’s a [...]

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Protected: twig-lets

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priorities

1. Try and calm down over operation
2. Sort out lifestyle - cut back on drinking, change diet. Cordell has been banging on at me all morning about how I need Vitamin B as my nervous system is shot to bits.
3. Rest.
4. Look at head issues
5. Pull myself out of this work rut and make the [...]

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Protected: more shitty news

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the mystery of the spoon

Daniel has helped me uncover who the spoon is.
I do wonder how he came across this blog - and whether it really is a coincidence or whether there is more to it… And all he had to do was say hi because he knows fully well who he is…

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sybil being cute

I sometimes think that my rats can sense my mood. I have been in pieces from about 2pm onwards today. I know what triggered it, and I have tried to think rationally and shift it but I have failed pretty spectacularly. The Girls have been very affectionate tonight.
Here is Sybil being exceptionally cute:

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big cuz

Just heard from my Aunt. Big Cuz was in a “terrible car accident” last night. Don’t know what’s happening. Gather he walked away. Car is a write off. Aunt is inconsolable - she drove past the scene without recognising the car (because of the mess) and so didn’t realise it was him until someone got [...]

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too late for me…

…but welcome news for girls who could potentially grow up to be in the same situation as me without it.

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lady stuff

Yesterday evening I got my underarms waxed for the first time. While I was moaning about how scared I was at lunchtine, CRG told me that it wasn’t painful and not to be a big baby about it. So, after work I toddled off not worrying in the slightest.
And you know what?! SHE LIED!
All last [...]

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To the reader in their New York office, I did your charity run in Battersea Park, London, a few months back. I think you ought to send me a prize

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Protected: more twists and turns than… a very twisty turny thing

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Today is my blog’s first birthday. Happy birthday blog.
I just wanted to thank you guys for coming with me, sticking by me, offering me support, making me laugh, being interested in what I have to say, permitting me to be a little bit unhinged (but if I get too unhinged, pointing it out and telling [...]

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spoon (again (again))

Spoon, you continue to torment me.
You use Windows Vista. Unveil yourself!

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You may be aware that I am a bit of an Eddie Izzard fan. You may also be aware that one of my favourite stand up sketches he does is where Darth Vadar has a ruckus with a canteen worker. Goron emailed me this yesterday. It is just BRILLIANT, so I would like to share [...]

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Oh yes! My holiday request has been granted. From 17 December 2007 until 1 January 2008 I am officially FREE TO DO WHAT THE HELL I LIKE (provided it doesn’t break any laws). In fact, from 15 Dec, if we want to count the weekend as well. That’s HALF A MONTH OF NO WORK!
And I [...]

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I was just getting into bed when I realised that I had 8 messages in my voicemail. I picked up. The first was from Big Cuz.
Have I spoken to Simon with an E recently? He’s just had a “wonderful conversation with her” (= ranting and raving) and can I call him back?
I text to say [...]

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I was talking to Daniel on MSN the other night. Without going into the conversation much, I made a comment that I now ought to retract. I told him that I don’t really think of past chapters of my life very much. They just close and the next one begins. To illustrate this, I said [...]

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Protected: mypod: flabby chin - the evidence

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honey and sugar

Suspect sugar level just plummeted.
Ratty and fight-picky again.
Thank god there is only another hour to go.
Intend to lock self in bathroom and indulge in scalding hot soak in the tub with bubbles and a bottle of red wine when I get home.
On an upside, Lush have introduced their Honey I Washed The Kids scent in [...]

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stodge

I had bangers and mash with onion gravy for my lunch. Bad, but perfect for when you’re down in the dumps. I am now following it up with a STAR BAR so lots of fat and sugar and the flabby bit under my chin will grow.

But it has made the world a better place for [...]

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fissures

Today isn’t going well. I can’t think straight. My sister is a stupid, selfish little cow. She has just cost me £75. I haven’t got the energy to blog about it.
My mother has done her usual, glossing over things because she doesn’t understand. What the hell does she know anyway? Her tone was accusatory as [...]

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Protected: ungrateful

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i am so angry right now

And I can’t quite pinpoint who is to blame. I just feel rage bubbling up inside of me. I know that this is frustration. I know it is just my way of not totally dissolving (again). There are two options for A Girl Like Me at A Time Like This:

cry
get angry

Most normal people have other [...]

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freezing

Last night I was tucked up in bed with The Duvet snug around me and wearing tracksuit bottoms, thick socks and a big jumper and with the warmth of the laptop on my knees when my phone beeped. It was a desperate plea from Desk Editor to turn on the heating before her fingers dropped [...]

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insomnia

Again.

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jo’s trust

For any women who have found my blog by ‘google’-ing about abnormal smears, HPV, CIN (1, 2 or 3), colposcopy, LLETZ, pre-cancer, cervical cancer and so on. Tonight I found a really useful website. Visit the Jo’s Trust site to get a balanced view of what you may be experiencing.
It won’t necessarily “make it better”, [...]

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maternity

I hold my hands up here and admit that I have never been very good with kids. Not until Baby O. Then I discovered a maternal side that had been hidden deep under commitment-phobia and an natural attraction to far too many glasses of wine to get me through a pregnancy.
Oh, and a disaster of [...]

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Protected: not. drinking. again. liver. shot. to. bits.

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1. So, we lost the rugby. Bum. Which is one reason why I am home before midnight.
2. I also spent too long thinking about my binge drinking behaviour. Thanks Dom. Now I can’t even get shit faced without feeling guilty. I felt alarmed that I was able to get home easily, and, indeed, be [...]

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get well soon

Just got back from a morning of getting totally confused about cameras with Dom. Thanks for lunch Dom!
There was a card waiting on the mat when I walked through the front door. A get well soon card from work. Signed by everyone in the office, including The Big Boss. All of them have put little [...]

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spoon (again)

You were on my blog all of 4 minutes ago.
Who ARE you? It is driving me crazy.

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facebook

This has made me feel a little cheerier. Thanks.
It reminds me of something Fire Man showed me… Enjoy:

Bloody Fire Man (he isn’t in this, by the way. He was nothing to do with it. He just happened to show me.)

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Protected: i blame tiredness

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Protected: meh 191007

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The scariest thing just happened to me. I don’t know how either. I don’t know how. The windows are shut.
I was just on the phone, complaining to the account manager that handles my account at an emarketing firm. Sitting at my laptop, looking gorgeous in my dressing gown and socks, I was just running my [...]

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I knew the NHS was a shambles, but I never imagined quite how big the mess is.
I wonder if anything more can go wrong with diagnosing and treating me - or am I being foolish tempting fate?
Complications.
Local anesthetic procedure today won’t do the job. Something about cell abnormality being “high grade” rather than “low grade” [...]

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I finally got some sleep. Not enough, mind, but sleep is still sleep. The last time I looked at the clock last night was about midnight, so that is almost like going to sleep at a normal time on a normal day. Unfortunately, seven hours is not enough in one go when you are missing [...]

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crazy pants

I have to thank Venting for the laugh she raised.
I also have to remind all men here that not all women are psychos. Just me.
And that I have been awake since 7am yesterday morning. Not a wink of sleep.
Ok, so I am crazy.
Just don’t forget: Beardy

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elections

Votes that appear to have been cast:
- For Fire Man’s innocence/Big fat misunderstanding/Blue you need to get some sleep =
El Pres, Dom, Pinky, Sarah, Ms20, Coatman, Me But Not, Fabby = 8 at 2.45pm
- For Blue soup’s theories =
Blue, Rich, Adam = 3 at 2.45pm
- Totally not sure/no vote cast = J, Blue dog, [...]

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Protected: 0418

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Protected: 0240

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Protected: pasta soup

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I have also decided that Fire Man can never come back to my place and stay overnight if the following day is a weekday. Again, the trains were a total nightmare this morning. They are getting worse. Having gotten his morning train with him last week, and enjoyed the immense space and actually being able [...]

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Protected: a case in point

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headcase

I am in bed. Typing while in bed is very difficult.  I am so tired. Why can I sleep all day, but not at night?
There are drums outside. Fuck knows why?! It’s like a crazy tribal war dance going on in the warehouses behind the house. Dun dun dun duuuun. Just need african war lords [...]

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Protected: end of the line

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Protected: ha!… a ha ah ahaaa haaaa ahaa

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“oh bloody hell”

… among the first words uttered by Events Lady this morning. She has been off for two weeks - one week on a lovers’ holiday to Spain with Clicky Man (yes, the secret affair), and a week away with work in North America (along with The Boss). It has been bliss.
She’s been back in the [...]

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I think this may have to become a regular feature. I mean, aside from the general gripes about commuting in London… I think actual letters to the imbeciles that make the daily migration to and from work such a misery really are in order.
Not sure how I’ll get these letters to them, given that Royal [...]

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Protected: fizzle

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Protected: well, we weren’t kissing up a tree… and, no, he didn’t meet my duvet

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the verdict

I think I am still drunk.
Team Fire Man, you were all…. absolutely… right about him. I have got to stop being such a suspicious old bag.
I will be back later, have the password at the ready.

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ha! you miss me!

Text message convo today
Fire Man: You’re very quiet on the old email today… x x x
Blue soup: You so miss me x
Fire Man: That isn’t the point… x x x
Blue soup: Is too… x
Fire Man: Where are you then? x x x
Blue soup: Apart from in your dreams you mean…? x
Fire Man: Lets [...]

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Protected: oh. good god. no!

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tiny little world

Sales Girl’s mum used to be my Big Cuz’s teacher when he was a wee kiddy at primary school.
Sales Girl who randomly started working at the same company as me in London about 6 months ago. Big Cuz who lives down in Other Random South Coast Town.
All too weird.

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Not sure. The fact that Fire Man emailed at all (joking or not), I think gives away that he thought about me this morning. Better than Beardy managed…

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happy birthday

…to Mr TT. Today he is 34. I took him a card and a packet of Buttons at lunchtime. On a sadder note, Coffee Girl no longer works in The Cafe. She has left to go to college.

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Protected: the tunnel, and associated fears

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Well, I am back from my mri scan. We have good news and bad news today my lovely blog friends. I’ll start with what is good:

I survived being trapped in a *very* small tunnel. I’m not claustrophobic, but I thought I might die when the table moved me backwards and in to it. Plus all [...]

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The Boss is away in the US. This means I have the next four days to sort out the mess he left behind.
I am never going to get the magazine copy sorted by 26 October… or the other BIG report… or the BIG year review. Bum.
Mr M suggested that I will likely be reporting to [...]

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Policeman breaks the law!! (Clicky image for bigger)

I thought of disgruntled commuter when I saw this.
I would also like to add that the lights had gone red well before he drew up alongside me! The policeman deliberately drove in to the cycle box before stopping.
Points if anyone can tell me where this was taken (unlikely).

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Protected: can i get an “f”, can i get an “i”…

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nee naw nee naw nee naw

Fire Man just about redeemed himself courtesy of some nice text messages last night. I ignored the last one. I felt mean, but he can’t win every time. We have a date on Thursday. Let’s see how much he infuriates me between now and then (and on Thursday itself).

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fire man fucks up

Fire Man is a bit of a fibber. Just a little fib, mind, but I can’t take any games. It’s Sunday, I have a hangover and a mix of cheap WKD Blue Rip Off Drink and cheap Smirnoff Ice Rip Off Drink in my hair (photos on Facebook and Flickr), and loads of reading [...]

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I just wrote a HUGE post.
I got to the end, and CNTL+A, and then delete.
Sorry.
Last night I fucked it all up over text message with Fire Man.
I am a stupid bint.
But HE rescued it. This morning, I am not sure what his opinion of me is, but I lost major points last night. I am [...]

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Last night I went for dinner with The Bum. Great night out, although regretted all the wine this morning while I sweated it out on a packed train to Waterloo and then tottered down Holborn to a Very Important Meeting with a Very Important Company MD. Oops.
Anyway, that isn’t what I am posting about. Amidst [...]

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Protected: A bird that can fly, but struggles to try*

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dog house

Fire Man suspects he is in the dog house. Well, maybe he is. Undecided. He’s a busy person like me. I think that is the issue. Actually, not so much that as his failure to recognise that, being busy people, we have to think ahead a little about meeting up.
Saw Fire Man on Sunday, complete [...]

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perfect housemate

I got home late last night due to having attended The Course (another intensive session, but I have struck up a bit of a friendship with two other girls my age, and the other people that joined the three of us at our table were all very chatty as well, so left on rather a [...]

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mixed (smoke) signals*

PJB mentioned in one of her comments that perhaps Fire Man is bewildered by me and that perhaps I am giving him mixed signals that he is finding hard to respond to?
Well, I thought about this. And, being argumentative (who? me?), I reject it. (I hasten to add that I don’t reject our jelly friend, [...]

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Thought that would get your attention! I have to keep this brief. I may or may not return at lunchtime (I have three chapters of two riveting text books to plough through).
1. I was up early this morning in order to read aforementioned book chapters, but caved to lolling in bed watching BBC Breakfast News, [...]

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a drink after work

and he’s back in the game.
Just.

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extinguished

PS - Fire Man blew it. Pity really, but oh well. Probably for the best.

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a lot of shit

Walking down the road from the office to Stuffy Institution this morning, The Boss turns to me and announces that he had to go to A&E on Saturday night. Naturally, I turn to him and my face is a picture of concern (I was well brought-up you see). I say that I hope it is [...]

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thank god for…

… tracky bottoms
… big slouchy uni jumper
… Palmolive Almond shower milk
… Herbal Essences
… Judge Judy on ITV2 until 7pm
… Cherry Garcia Ben & Jerry’s
… Hardy’s Crest wine (ok, so I decided I wouldn’t drink alcohol Sunday-Thursday nights, but there is only one glass worth left so I am having it now)
… Big, warm, heavy, KING [...]

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Protected: something you don’t already know…

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