order of service

06Oct09

I’ve written this in advance, as I’m pretty busy today.

Today is the day that we say goodbye to Dad. In the formal sense. Today is the day of his funeral.

We are holding a memorial service later this month in the chapel in Stock, which is the village where he was born. After that service, we will scatter his ashes around the big oak tree at the end of the garden where he grew up, and the goodbyes will continue. A few days later will be his 59th birthday and the family is supposed to be getting together for that. More goodbyes.

Then Christmas without him.

And goodbyes every day until the day I die and head off to join him I expect.

The funeral service is being held at the crematorium just around the corner from his house. He used to walk around the crematorium (and cemetery) grounds as it’s a little oasis of peace and quiet in the hustle and bustle of shitty south London. In the same grounds, he taught me to drive (the Citroen ZX that I later crashed in that Sutton car park). The service starts at 12.45pm and runs until 1.30pm. I spent Sunday afternoon finalising the Order of Service booklets with Elle: making sure that we were happy with what we had put together, the Blackadder and Fawlty Towers quotes that we had included here and there on the spare pages in the booklets (might not sound right to you, but works for us and very “Dad”), printing the sheets out two-to-a-page and double-sided in the right order, slipping the inners into the card sleeves that we made ourselves last week…

The Order of Service goes like this:

Opening music: Mozart – ‘Piano concerto 21’

Welcome and Minister’s Remarks: Rev. Anita McKenzie

Poem: ‘Miss me but let me go’ – Read by Elle
When I come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me,
I want no tears in a gloom-filled room,
Why cry for a soul set free?

Miss me a little – But not for long
And not with your head bowed low,
Remember the love that we once shared,
Miss me – But let me go.

For this is a journey we all must take,
And each must go alone,
It’s all a part of the Master’s plan
A step on the road to home.

When you are lonely and sick of heart
Go to your friends that we know,
And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds
Miss me – but let me go.

Music: The Shadows – ‘Wonderful Land’

Eulogy: Read by Dad’s brother

Music for Reflection: Beethoven – ‘Moonlight Sonata’

Poem: ‘He is gone’ – Read by Soupy
You can shed tears that he is gone
Or you can smile because he has lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back,
Or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left.

Your heart can be empty because you can’t see him,
Or you can be full of the love that you shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember him and only that he is gone,
Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on.

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back,
Or you can do what he would want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

Music: Cliff Richard – ‘Remember me’

Committal and Closing Prayer

Closing Music: Queen – ‘The Miracle’

ENDS

I never want to plan another funeral so long as I live.

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